I (Shannon) came home from work today, changed into my “outside clothes”, took Betty White out for a stroll, and when we returned, she sat on the porch and watched me as I unraveled the hose to water the plants. It was a scorcher today, so it took longer than usual to quench all of the plants’ thirst and get them rejuvenated again. I was being careful as I watered my hibiscus plant. I wasn’t taking extra precaution because it is my favorite, but because the one bloom that opened this morning, appears to already be closing shop for the day. You see, that is what hibiscus plants do. They can have lots of blooms at times, but when they bloom, each only lasts for a day, two days max. I knew this morning when I saw it, that it would be gorgeous throughout this sunny day, but would be gone by evening.
Normally, this process doesn’t bring me to tears, but this evening, it did. As I was watering around the one bloom, I started thinking about how you really have to take in each day of beauty that you can- people, places, experiences…all of them, because soon enough, they may not be here anymore, or you/me may not be here. Naturally, as I do, I started thinking about my boy, Pharrell. His birthday is coming up next week, I guess that is why the extra emotions are raising their head to say hello, again. I am so grateful to have had him here during those wonderful 15 years, but it is still so fresh- that wound that so much seems to break wide open again.
Grief is a strange thing. It makes you so very sad, mad, and then grateful, all in one really messed up package. Today, that package is in the form of a hibiscus bloom, which I cut off gently, brought it inside, put it into a glass of water, so that I can hold on to it as long as I can, and enjoy it’s beauty for a little longer. I then gave Betty White lots of hugs and kisses until she was done with me and went back to her sunshine on the porch.